Harnessing Metacognition: A Mindful Approach to Connecting with Your Horse

In the world of horse ownership, where the bond between rider and steed is as vital as any equipment or technique, there exists a powerful yet often overlooked tool: metacognition.


So, what exactly is metacognition? In simple terms, it’s the ability to think about your own thinking. It’s almost like having a second pair of eyes observing your mind’s inner workings.

In the realm of horsemanship, cultivating metacognitive skills can be a big game-changer. Imagine being able to step back from the immediate tasks at hand and analyse not just what you’re doing, but how you’re doing it. This heightened awareness opens doors to deeper connections with your horse and a more refined approach to training and communication.

At its core, metacognition empowers horse owners to understand their own mental processes. By honing this skill, riders can better regulate their emotions, manage stress, and make more informed decisions in, and out of the saddle. When faced with a challenging situation, such as a spooked horse or a tricky maneuver, metacognition allows riders to assess their own reactions and feelings and adjust accordingly, fostering a calmer, more confident presence that horses can respond to, positively.

But the benefits don’t end there! Metacognition also plays a crucial role in understanding your horse’s mind. By observing our own thought processes, we become more attuned to the subtle cues and body language of our horses. We learn to anticipate their actions, interpret their signals more accurately, and respond with greater empathy and understanding.

Imagine, for instance, encountering a hesitant horse during a hack/trail ride. Instead of reacting impulsively, a metacognitively aware rider might pause to assess their own feelings of frustration, nerves, or anxiety. By acknowledging and addressing these emotions, they can approach the situation with a clear mind and a compassionate demeanor, helping to reassure the horse and ease its apprehension.

Moreover, metacognition fosters a growth mindset—a belief in our capacity to learn and improve over time. Just as we can reflect on our own experiences and adjust our behavior accordingly, so too can we adapt our training methods to suit the individual needs of our horses. This flexible, open-minded approach lays the groundwork for continuous progress and mutual trust between horse and rider (which is ultimately what we are all looking for!)

In essence, metacognition is the bridge that connects the realms of thought and action, enabling us to navigate the intricate dance of horsemanship, with grace and insight.

By embracing this mindful approach, horse owners can unlock new levels of harmony, understanding, and fulfillment in their equine partnerships.

So, the next time you saddle up, and work with your horse, remember to harness the power of metacognition—it just might be the key to unlocking your horse’s full potential!

Need some help harnessing metacognition for yourself?

Pop me an email at info@idyllwildhorsemanship.com and I’ll be happy to discuss how I can help you!

Reframing ‘Have To’ to ‘Get To’

I write to you from my sick bed! I can’t remember the last time I had a cold, and honestly, I’d started to take pride in the fact that I haven’t had one in I don’t know how long! I’d even started to think that I must have some cool kind of immunity thing going on.

But nope. That is not the case! I have a cold, and its the mother of all blooming colds. I’ve been sneezing my head off, my eyes won’t stop watering to the point that one of them is swollen, and I just generally feel bloody miserable.I’m surrounded by tissues, I’ve been drinking immune herbal tea like its going out of fashion (and its not blooming working!!!) and Mavis keeps giving me funny looks every time it looks like I’m going to sneeze. (is anyone elses dog mortified when their humans sneeze or is it just mine..?!)

Safe to say, I’m not feeling the most joyful right now, and I am having to surrender to rest. After I’ve finished this I’ll be taking a nap!

My question for you to ponder today, is why we never really fully appreciate our health, and feeling ‘normal’ until we get sick?! I always talk about gratitude and appreciation, and how important it is in our lives in general and with our horses, and its just as important with our health too.

I think its so important to take the time to appreciate what we have, and that we GET to do things. We get ‘should’ and ‘have to’ so mixed up, and we forget that we in fact are very privileged in this life, and we’re very lucky to do the things with our horses that we sometimes shy away from. We GET to spend time with our horses. We GET to have the energy, health, and physical function to muck them out, we GET to have the time and the energy to poo pick their paddocks, we GET to have the capacity (most of the time!!) to pay their livery, feed, and vet bills.

This reframe can be so powerful in changing how we look at life, and therefore improving our overall well-being and the time we spend with our horses. I invite you to try that reframe for afew days to see what you think, sprinkling more gratitude and appreciation into our lives can do some very profound things for our mindset, and our relationships with our equine friends.

Above all we should never forget how lucky we are, or what an honor it is to live our lives alongside our horses.

If you you’d like to explore mindset reframes further with me, head over to my services page to see how I can help you!

www.idyllwildhorsemanship.com/services

Otherwise, I hope you found that helpful, have a great day!

Over and Out!

An Attitude of Gratitude

Today I write to you from one of my favorite cafes, I’m currently parked up on a picnic bench, under a willow tree, listening to incredibly vibey music and sipping on a coconut cappuccino. Just to add to the scene, I am post yoga class too!

In this moment, all I can feel is IMMENSE gratitude. If I was a cat, (which honestly is not an animal I relate to!) I swear I’d be purring right now!

This time 18 months ago, I was MISERABLE. I had made a very questionable decision, and upped and moved my life, myself, and my animals to a bad place, with bad people. All because I didn’t feel like I was quite good enough to fully put myself out there with my business yet, I felt I wasn’t quite ready, and I was sure I still had more to learn, before I ‘deserved’ to share myself and my knowledge with others.

What I DID learn, was that A) I now have considerably more self worth/respect for myself than I ever have, and therefore I will not put myself through rubbish that I don’t need to  B) I know more than I thought and C) The power of ‘I’ll show you itis’ is incredibly strong, and when you remember things happen for you and not to you, you can use it to light a fire under your ass to do what you need to do to reach your goals!

Before I left this place, I was not in a good spot mentally, I felt stuck, abit broken, and all I dreamed of was this moment that I’m sat in right now, being fully self employed, running my business, being my own boss, and doing something I truly love…helping people and their horses. (and occasionally doing it sat in a lovely cafe sipping coffee!)

And while I am by no means at the point where I want to be, and the biz still has ALOT of growing left to do to help support me, the animals, and living my best life…I am SO appreciative of this journey.

Some days things are difficult, some days I feel like I put myself out there and no ones listening, some days I worry I’m not going to make enough money, and wonder if I should just get ‘a proper job’ But days like today, I remember why I will KEEP doing this. 

Working for myself, doing what I love, helping people quite literally change their lives and that of their horses, means the world. It is SUCH a privilege and an honor, and is definitely why I was put on this earth. 

In hard moments, and when you feel like life isn’t quite going your way (with your horse or otherwise), finding small moments of joy and gratitude is so incredibly important. The small things really are the big things.

Last week we touched on gratitude, and having a gratitude practice inside of EEP, and this practice always has a profound affect on my students.

So if you don’t have a gratitude practice, I invite you to give it a try, for a day, or even a week.

And you’ll find more and more to be grateful for, and suddenly, your whole outlook on life has changed.

So there you go!

I hope this landed with whomever it needed to! 

What is ‘confidence’ anyway?

As someone who is passionate about helping horses and humans develop deeper connections and confidence, within themselves, and within relationships with each other; ‘confidence’ and the state of being ‘confident’ is a word I hear thrown around a lot.  

But what does it mean to be confident? Here we’re going to look at it from two different perspectives, human, and horse. 

First off, let’s take a look at what confidence means to us human beings. 

Confidence is a word that can be construed in a myriad of different ways, and over the years it’s become a word that could potentially be quite loaded, depending upon its use, and the meaning from the person speaking it. In our society for instance, more often than not, someone who is deemed to be ‘over confident’ is someone to be disapproved of, thought of as arrogant, and to some, a person deemed to be so, could be seen as someone outspoken, opinionated, and perhaps even ‘gung-ho’ and thoughtless. As a nation of people who pride themselves on being stoic, humble, and self-deprecating, describing ourselves as being confident, is something that we often shy away from. 

The dictionary definition of ‘confidence’ however, is ‘the feeling or belief that one can have faith in, or rely on someone, or something’. 

Feeling, Belief, and Faith. Those words stand out to me in that definition, because I think they articulate perfectly what I personally consider ‘true’ confidence to be. 

For me, confidence isn’t about what you tell people. It’s not how you articulate your experience, or your knowledge, it’s not about how you present yourself, or even in the actions you take. It isn’t about jumping the highest jump in the arena, climbing on the bucking horse, or galloping out on a hack, when you’d rather just have a casual amble around the countryside, watching the world go by. 

For me, confidence is feeling that you are adequately prepared for any situation that may arise, and feeling relaxed, and happy because of it. It’s having faith in your own knowledge and training, and being open minded enough to ask questions and seek help, if something pops up that’s out of your comfort zone. It’s about having the grace, to understand that both horsemanship, and self-development, are INCREDIBLY closely connected, and that the journey of learning and growing both, is endless. It’s having the self-belief, to hold your course, no matter what others may say, or situations that may present themselves to you. It’s having the empathy and patience, to understand that everything and everyone can teach us something, for better, or for worse- and nothing happens to us that we can’t handle. 

Finally, for us humans, I think it’s so important to accept, that confidence is something that takes time, and can ebb and flow like tides of the sea. Starting new ventures, hobbies (for instance riding a different horse or in a different discipline) can often leave us feeling slightly vulnerable, and lacking in an abundance of the c-word, but with time and the right support, the aforementioned feeling, faith, and the belief, will grow and blossom. It is OK, and it is natural, to feel vulnerable. Without vulnerability, we cannot grow. We are only human of course, none of us are perfect, we all start somewhere, and we were all put on this earth to grow and learn. 

So, what about confidence for our horses? What does it mean for our four-legged friends? Going boldly where no horse has gone before? Handling any new experience without so much as a snort? 

What does a confident horse look like? 

For me, a confident horse is relaxed, and able to focus on the job or situation in hand. Whether that is chasing a cow, mooching around the countryside on a hack, executing a reining pattern in a casual, and super cool manner, or simply standing and enjoying a groom from their devoted human. This horse has soft eyes, feels relaxed enough to lick, chew and yawn on occasion, and has a casual interest in their surroundings. This horse, it’s important to add, is not to be confused with a horse that is ‘shut down’, (a subject for another time). 

 As prey and flight animals, horses are hard wired to question their safety in any new or potentially threatening environment, or situation. They have a primal instinct to want to survive and feel safe, and it is up to us as their humans, to help them relax and learn that they can trust in us, and whatever we may present them with. It’s important to add here, that we have to allow our horses to show emotion, and to respond to things. If we do this, making sure we are rewarding signs of relaxation, we can exercise their ‘panic muscle’, turning the ‘OMG’ into the ‘oh ok!’ without ‘shutting them down’. With understanding, repetition, and breaking down and building up the ‘scary’ things, we can help them build confidence, in themselves, and in us.  

Sure, some horses, as with humans, are born to be more relaxed and confident than others, and some can be ‘sharper’, more alert, and reactive, depending on breeding, genetics, and experiences (good or bad) in their lives up to now. But I think for us, it’s important to realise that we CAN help our horses, if we take the time to recognise stress indicators, body language, and the other small signs our horse may give us that they are worried, or reaching their thresholds of fear, and not feeling so confident about what they are experiencing in any given moment. 

By recognising and responding to the signs our horses are giving us, and working WITH our horses in every moment, we can help them to enter any new environment or situation with a little more serenity, and a little less ‘oh my god am I going to die?!’.  

By having the empathy, patience, and understanding to be able to break things down into manageable steps, we help our horses to feel seen, heard, and understood. While working in this way is definitely not a magical overnight fix, it will lay the foundations of a deeper connection, and a growth of trust between you and your horse.  

The results from applying this approach to your life with your horse in this way, are profound, and if your horse is confident in you, and trusts you, then you can be more confident in your horse, and trust in yourself, and achieving your goals, big or small. Then you can stride off into the world together, as a partnership, feeling pretty damn good about yourselves and wherever it is you’re headed! 

So here’s to cultivating that feeling of confidence, whatever that means to you, and your four legged friend.